Parenting Your 2nd Grader

JUMP TO SECTION

The Phase when fairness matters most, differences get noticed, and your enthusiastic kid thinks anything sounds like fun!

FAIRNESS MATTERS

Cops. CSI. Nancy Drew. Barney Fife. Whatever the badge, your child will quickly apprehend and convict you for offenses of unfairness. They may also report the offenses of others, including teachers, classmates, or puppies—if they detect a preference that isn’t in their favor.

DIFFERENCES DISPLAY THEIR UNIQUENESS

Your second grader’s brain is changing in some incredible ways, and they are beginning to notice, “Not everyone is like me.” Until now, everyone was pretty equal. Seriously, what second grader isn’t “the best” at everything? By second grade, kids take notice of qualities that make one kid “athletic” and another “artistic.”

THIS PHASE IS A BLEND OF CAPABLE AND DEPENDENT

You are entering the golden years of childhood. No one should have a favorite phase, but if you like this phase a whole lot, you aren’t alone. Your kid is impressionable, eager, and excited about what you are excited about. If you think something sounds like fun, it won’t take much to convince them it really is fun.

Love to Give

“Do I have what it takes?”

This is the one major question your second grader is asking. They are becoming increasingly self-aware—aware of their thoughts, aware of their abilities, and very aware of their mistakes. Even though your kid is gaining independence in some wonderful ways, don’t miss the internal struggle of this phase.

Your second grader wants to know if they have what it takes to make the team, to get the grade, and to measure up to their own (and your) standards. The best way to do that is by engaging their interests.

You can engage their interests by…

…showing curiosity about their activities.

…encouraging their efforts.

…helping them push through setbacks.

WAYS TO LOVE

-Schedule your day. Write down all you do for your second grader on a typical day, and include how much time each task takes. Now take a minute to celebrate what a good parent you really are. It will be especially helpful to revisit this list on a bad day.

-Pay attention to what your second grader likes. What does your child seem to enjoy the most right now?

-How are you taking time for yourself? It’s impossible to love anyone with the relentless effort a second grader demands unless you are refueling each week. What are some ways you can take care of yourself so you are able to give your kid the love they need?

-Who do you have around you supporting you this year? Family? Your Missional Community? Your DNA? Other friends?

Books to Read

Beforever (Series)
by American Girl

Cam Jansen and the Mystery of the Babe Ruth Baseball
by David A. Adler

Fly Guy (Series)
by Tedd Arnold

Ivy + Bean (Series)
by Annie Barrows

Freckle Juice Fudge-A-Mania
by Judy Blume

The Family Under the Bridge
by Natalie Savage Carlson

Henry Huggins (Series)
by Beverly Cleary

The Mouse and the Motorcycle
by Beverly Cleary

Mercy Watson (Series)
by Kate DiCamillo

The Tale of Desperaux
by Kate DiCamillo

The Hundred Dresses
by Eleanor Estes

In the Tree House
by Andrew Larsen

Judy Moody (Series)
by Megan McDonald

The Complete Tales of Winnie-the-Pooh
by A.A. Milne

Amelia Bedelia (Series)
by Peggy Parish

The Random House Book of Poetry for Children
by Jack Prelutsky

Tales for Very Picky Eaters
by Josh Schneider

The Boxcar Children (Series)
by Gertrude Chandler Warner

The Little House (Series)
by Laura Ingles Wilder

Coming on Home Soon
by Jacqueline Woodson

Milestones to Achieve

Work your second grader can do:

Tie shoes

Bathe and brush teeth independently

Do homework (with assistance)

Pack for a trip (if you make the packing list)

Address, stamp, and mail a letter

Handwash the dishes

Fold and put away laundry

Use a can opener, cheese grater, toaster oven, microwave, or electric mixer

Count money and make change

Make their bed and clean their room

Use a screwdriver or wrench

Wrap a present (depending on how much you care about the result)

Fun to Have

Games:

Clue Jr.

Hedbanz

Monopoly

Guess Who?

Battleship

Blokus

Quirkle

Checkers

Chess Dominos

Bingo

Connect Four

Spot It

Topple

Square Up

Activities:

Crafts with beads or string

Art of any kind

Spoons (card game)

Phase 10, Skip-Bo (card games)

Four square

Cup-song around the table

Charades

Hangman

Dots

Keep Away

Freeze Tag

Mad Libs

Karaoke

Paper football

Paper airplanes

Water balloons

Legos

Beanbag toss

50-100 piece puzzles

Words to Speak

Good morning, I love you, I have noticed, keep trying, I hope you know, have fun, please, keep trying, thank you, I’m really proud when, I’ve been thinking, I’m sorry, work hard, be kind, I enjoy spending time with you, good night!

This year you will…

DEVELOP POSITIVE ROUTINES

Maintain a good relationship with your pediatrician, and schedule a well visit at least once per year. You can also begin to develop healthy habits for your second grader with a few simple words.

Say things like…

People have different body types like they have different eye colors.

The mayonnaise can’t sit in the sun all day.

Can you cut out the biscuits?

That’s a big serving. We can take that home if you don’t finish.

I love to watch you play!

Let’s play freeze tag!

INFORM THEM ABOUT HOW THINGS WORK

This is a good year to be intentional about having more thorough talks with your child about marriage, conception, and body changes that will happen with puberty. These topics are likely to come up at school, and it’s best if your kid knows you are available to talk about them.

Say things like…

Can we talk more about this another time?

God made sex and designed it to be a good gift for a husband and wife.

I’m so glad you asked me.

Sex is private, it’s not something we watch or look at.

What have you heard about sex?

It’s natural to be curious about our bodies.

When a girl starts to become a woman, she will…

When a boy starts to become a man, he will…

For a little help, check out resources like How God Makes Babies by Dr. Jim Burns, Simple Truths by Mary Flo Ridley, or Before I Was Born by Stan and Brenna Jones.

EXPLORE THE POSSIBILITIES OF TECHNOLOGY

Your second grader is smarter than you when it comes to devices—it’s okay. That’s normal. But, even though your kid is a digital native, they still need an adult guide as they continue to explore all the great things they can do with technology.

Say things like…

Never post a phone number or address without checking with me.

I don’t know, but we can look that up together.

You have __ minutes of screen time for today.

Let me see what you did.

Can we play together?

What is the content rating? What is the commitment level? What is the connection to other players?

PROVOKE DISCOVERY

Your second grader may be starting to enjoy reading. So, this is a great year to encourage skills that will help them enjoy reading the Bible. Make sure they have a full text Bible in an easy-to-read translation like the NIrV. Continue having other faith conversations as you go about your days together.

Say things like…

Can I pray about that with you?

You can trust God no matter what.

You need to make the wise choice

You should treat others the way you want to be treated.

When I first trusted Jesus… (share your own faith story)

The Bible has 66 books. The big numbers mark the chapter, and the little numbers mark the verse.

Our family sets aside 10% of what we make to give to our church. (Talk about how you manage finances.)

I love that you noticed how they are feeling. What could we do to help?

I’m sorry I responded that way. Mom/Dad needs Jesus just like you do.